Whatever your parents have, will ultimately be yours!

“Hi Kanchan, how are you?”

“Hi Vikas, I am fine. What happened? You called so late!”

“Yes Kanchan, I don’t know how to say this, but I think, we will have to cancel our booking for that flat.”

“Oh, why? what happened? Wasn’t the broker suppose to get the paperwork done before our wedding? And now with just a week to go, what is the issue?”

“Even I don’t know. That broker just called and said, we need to give the remaining 20 lakhs within a week, or else the booking will be cancelled and we will loose our token money too.”

“Oh, but how can he do that now? With the wedding preparations and all, already we have a lot on our heads. How are we going to arrange 20 lakhs now?”

“That is what I was thinking. May be I should cancel the booking. Yes 10 lakh token money will be gone, but it’s impossible to arrange 20 lakhs in less than a week. I will call him first thing in the morning and cancel the flat. It’s just that, I did not wanted you to suffocate in our small flat, with a joint family, so I booked that flat, to give you a comfortable life. But I guess, we will have to let it go and look for another one in a few years.”

“Vikas, 10 lakhs is a big amount. Can’t the broker refund it?”

“No, I asked him and he refused.”

“Vikas, wait for sometime. Let me call you back.”

“Vikas, I just spoke to Dad. He is ready to give 20 lakhs. He said, he wanted to give a nice gift for the wedding anyways and was thinking of buying a car. But a house sounds even better and he said he will pay for it. He wanted to give the entire 30 lakhs, but I refused and told him to give 20 lakhs only.”

“No Kanchan, I can’t accept the money from you. I wanted to buy the flat for us, with my own money and I would have easily paid the installments, but this broker messed the whole thing. No! I better cancel the flat. How can I take money from your father?”

“It is OK Vikas, remember, your parents are my parents and my parents are your parents. And what shame in taking help from parents? Dad is happy to help. Let him.”

“Ok Kanchan, I don’t want to, but if you are pushing so much, then I will let him help, but I will return the money soon.”

“Ok baba, whatever you want to.”

“I love you, Kanchan.”

“I love you too,Vikas.”

………x…..x……x…….x……x……x……x…..

“Vikas, Can we buy a small car for me? It takes more than 2 hours to reach office by bus. If I have my own car, I can drive to office and reach in less than an hour.”

“Ok, I will think about it Kanchan.”

“Kanchan, I have a better idea, Why don’t you bring over your old car from your house, that you used to drive before you got married? You can bring that car here and use it, meanwhile, I will book another, new one for you. This way you won’t have to wait for a new car.”

“Yes, I can, but Mom drives it now.”

“Oho, Mom use it to go to kitty parties and buy vegetables. She can always book a cab. She doesn’t use that car much. It mostly stands covered in the parking. Moreover just talk to your Mom and see what she thinks about it? I am sure, if she know, that you need that car, they will not say no to you.”

“Yes, they will not say no, but it doesn’t feel right to keep asking them for something or the other. We still haven’t returned the money we took for this apartment.”

“That is because you said your father wanted to gift you a flat and I didn’t want to hurt his feelings, or else, I would have returned the money long back.”

“Yes, but you only said you will return……”

Vikas was angry by now “Kanchan, I gave you option to live in our old house, with the family but you chose to live seperately in an apartment. It was your choice and you asked your father for the money. I did not force you to take money from your parents and now you are making me feel as if I made you take money from your family. Plus you are the only daughter and your parents have many properties and so much money. What else will they do with it? Who else will they give it? Whatever is theirs, finally you will get it. So what is the big deal about it?”

Kanchan felt those words cutting through her heart like a dagger. It was not the first time that Vikas said all this. It has been two years to their wedding and she heard all this quite often and she always kept quite because somehow, Vikas made it all seem right. Plus she also didn’t want to fight with Vikas over all these lame issues. After all he was right. Her parents were rich and buying her a flat or that diamond set that she liked and Vikas sent the pictures to her mother, without telling her and her mother transferred the money to Vikas’s account and Vikas bought that set for her on their first anniversary. She came to know about it much later that Vikas took the money from her mother and promised to return it but never did.

Or that trip to London. When Vikas was going to London for some office project for 10 days and Kanchan wanted to go too. What will she do here alone anyways and they were newly married and wanted to spend time with each other and her father booked Kanchan’s ticket because Vikas couldn’t afford a return ticket on such short notice, but he wanted Kanchan to go with her, so he told her father and he happily booked the tickets and transferred money in his account for shopping too.

Or that new furniture or fridge or down payment for a property in Delhi. Vikas always took money from her parents on a promise to return, but he never did and her parents never asked for the money because they wanted Kanchan to be happy.

But money can’t buy happiness. She looked around her house. Ninety percent of things in this house were given to her by her parents. She was not sure how long this will go on and she hated to take money from her parents. She was always an independant girl who made her own money, from a very young age and never took help from her parents. Her parents always taught her to be financially independant and have self respect.

When she met Vikas at an office event, she thought he was a man with values and strong convincing power, that is the reason he won all the awards in the Marketing and Sales department every year. He was a man of words. The way he presented himself, Kanchan was impressed and fell in his trap.

Vikas knew she was from a rich family, while Vikas’s father was a clerk in the Income Tax department. He lived with a joint family, in a small government quarter, all his life and Kanchan’s big house and even bigger car, her carefree attitude, her lifestyle, her beauty and dressing sense, everything about her impressed him and he managed her to fall in love with him and finally marry him. He knew his life was going to change and it did.

First he bought the house and then he furnished the entire house in the most luxurious way. Then he bought a big car and many foreign trips in just two years of marriage. He loved Kanchan very much. She was a very nice girl who respected his family and took genuine care of his parents. But all this was secondary to him. He was always ambitious and he felt suffocated in the house he lived all his life. His dreams were big and he wanted to achieve much more and Kanchan was the key to all his dreams. He always kept her happy and pampered.

Kanchan understood now but she felt helpless. She touched her grown belly. It was just two more months and the baby will come. She wondered how much her parents still have to pay after the baby comes. A tear ran down her cheeks and fell on her belly. She knew what she had to do. She went inside the room and started to pack her bag. She didn’t want her baby to be like father.

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Love n hugs.

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My wishlist for 2018 (wishlist of every mother)

  • I get to sleep for one entire night without any disturbance.


  • I get to spend one entire day alone, doing nothing, just chilling, relaxing and reading.


  • I get to eat my food without anyone’s foot or fingers in it or for that matter, without cleaning the poop, running nose or puke  in between.


  • I get to watch a movie.


  • I get some sleep.


  • I get to go shopping, without having to worry about the wailing and howling kids in the mall.


  • A peaceful poop time and a nice and long bath time would really be a blessing.


  • I get some more sleep.


  • An outing with friends every month….alone.


  • A nice and clean house…that remains clean an entire day.


  • I get to sleep an entire night.


  • Unbroken makeup and accessories.


  • Unbroken decorative items, utensils, furniture, lights, laptops and mobile phones etc.


  • How I wish, my kids start behaving and eat food properly without bringing the house down.


  • I get to sleep and relax one entire day and night.


  • I get my sanity back.


  • One day without shouting my lungs out, without threatening to throw away some stuff, without threatening to throw everyone out of the house.


  • My husband and kids be a little co-operative.


  • I get to sleep a little.


  • I get to go to the gym and get to work on my body too.


  • Some peace of mind would be great.


  • Some sleep would be even better.


  • A no cooking day every month.And trust me, as I am writing all this…I am laughing at myself for wishing the impossible.


But one can wish… 


Miracles happen.


That middle class girl 

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Big sister…second to mother

My daughter, she’s just 7 years old, but at times when I see her, I understand why God created women. I know it’s a deep thought to start with. But yes..I do. She’s still a baby, at least in my eyes, she is, although she doesn’t agree with me in this matter, but I can see all forms of a women in her. She is a daughter, she is a sister, she behaves like a mother at times with her little brother, and the way she talks, I often call her grandmother 🤣. 

But jokes apart, I can see why people say that girl grow up faster. They do. May be God has created us in such a way. We learn our responsibilities early. We know that if we are elder sister, we need to protect and take care of our little sibling. If we are only child, we need to take care of our parents. If we are younger sister, we need to take care of elder sibling. We do everything in our ability to be caring and loving. 

I more than often see my daughter taking responsibility of something wrong that the little one did. Very often, she would come in between and ask me to stop, if I am scolding the little one. Everyday, without fail, she would ask “where is daddy..when will he come home?” before going to bed. If ever I am upset or unwell, she’s the one who would hover on my head to lift my spirit and be constantly worried about me. Whenever we go out, she’s the one who takes care of her baby brother. At times she even feeds him along with herself.

And all this I never asked her to do or anyone asked her to do. It is in-built. We women are made like that. We care. We love. We nurture. 

That’s why women is God’s finest creation.

That middle class girl 
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My idea of parenting

We all think our idea of parenting is the best and what the other person is saying or doing is wrong. 

But what’s right for you, may not be right for me. So we need to open our minds and hearts and keep experimenting.

But is there a specific, correct way of parenting? I guess not. Like every kid is different, the same way, parenting differs with them. 

A lot depends on the environment we live in and the kind of people we have around us. We can’t apply a rule which is right for one to be right for another. After all every child is different in its own way.

So what are the common things we can teach our children?

Here are a few things that I tell my children on almost a daily basis.

  • Be kind to everyone. Tell your kids to be kind towards not just other kids but towards animals, underprivileged children, homeless people,beggars etc.
  • Tell your kids to be helpful, everyday to everyone they can. Never back out from lending a helping hand. Have them help you in the kitchen and garden. Tell them to help their siblings, friends and family.
  • Teach them to take a stand for themselves.
  • Be happy. It’s important to have fun in life. Play, create something new, draw on the walls (its ok you can get it painted again ☺️). Go to park. Sneak on the ice creams and hidden treats  at night. Enjoy life.
  • Encourage your kids to have a hobby.
  • Don’t expect too much from your kids.
  • Respect their opinions.
  • Teach them sharing.
  • Have them spend time with grandparents.
  • Given the increasing rate of crime towards children, teach them to be careful. Make them learn any self defence technique. Teach them how to get out of a dangerous situation.
  • Tell them to read more and more. Books will be friend for life.
  • Encourage more outdoors than indoors. Go on picnics, walk in the parks and playdates.
  • No to videogames. Limit their time on TV and mobile phones.
  • Make it a habit of eating atleast one meal a day together and discuss your day with each other.
  • Let them earn things the hard way.
  • Don’t hesitate to ground them for their mistakes.
  • Don’t fill their pockets too much.
  • Teach them to value money and other things.
  • Don’t reward them too often.
  • Limit the expensive gifts.
  • Love them unconditionally for who they are, not what they do.
  • Discipline and setting limit is very important. Don’t worry about the anger and frustation, it will pass.
  • Let them take risk and learn from their own mistakes.
  • Talk to them about everything. Have open discussions at home and let them participate in them. Ask what they feel about every important decision at home.
  • Keep them away from negative environment. Don’t fight infront of them.

     That middle class girl 

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